I could write about our love story all day long. Because it's so random, because no one thought it would last, because we were so young, just because.
18 year old Lauren and 20 year old Eric had never met until we went to Providence Rhode Island with friends to a dance club hilariously called Club Hell. I was with the most random group of girls from high school, and technically had a boyfriend at the time. When Eric asked me to dance, I said yes despite funny looks from the rando-group. I remember him being a "respectful" dancer, keeping his hands appropriate unlike most guys in clubs. At the end of the night, he caught me outside and asked for my number. My friends couldn't believe I gave it to him, hence said boyfriend, but I was young and he was nice. When he texted me with his, I added him to my contacts as Club Kid Eric.
At-the-time-boyfriend found out about this little number exchange, and decided to save the number himself so he could be a macho-man and give him a ring. When Eric received the call, he was on a playground with a friend at the beach in Fairhaven, MA - a place I had never heard of and never knew I'd one day live. Eric, being all macho-man himself, responded to the call by saying that if he were keeping his woman satisfied she wouldn't be handing out her number.
So that was that. Onward with said boyfriend and goodbye to Club Kid Eric.
Fast forward one year later, boyfriend and I break up. I was in Maine with two friends, planning our next Club Hell excursion. Young, immature Lauren always needed to have the next move in play, so I thought "what are the chances?" and scroll down my contacts to Club Kid Eric. I said something along the lines of "Hey, you may not remember me, we met last year at Club Hell; I'm the one who's boyfriend called you...anyway...heading back to Providence this weekend with friends and wanted to see if you wanted to meet up". Little did I know, he was in a relationship and his girlfriend had his phone when this text came through. His response was a short "Sorry, I have a girlfriend". Damn. Delete.
Life moved on. Rebound Lauren found someone new, and Eric and his girlfriend broke up. He also deleted my number, but his break up sparked an interest to contact me. He had to go through old phone records to find it, and succeeded. By the time he messaged me I was in a relationship, but we found each other on AIM (if you know, you know) and social media. He got back with his girlfriend, and I got pregnant, but we cordially stayed in touch; especially when I was up all hours of the night with a newborn and he was working late shift electrical jobs.
When the time came for me to admit that I was unhappy in my relationship, I confided in Eric. He actually encouraged me not to leave (which he now jokes was reverse psychology) - because he believed families should stay together. But my happiness was important not only for myself but for the mother I would be to my daughter. I left.
Soon after, Eric started asking to hang out. I was an ass about it. Or a good mother. I told him I was not ready for a relationship, that I would not ditch my daughter to hang out, that meeting up would mean going for a run, or joining us at the playground. Cue our first "hang out" where he drove the hour and a half to my mom's house, after my daughter was asleep, where we drank Mike Hard Lemonades and ate all the food my Italian mother had spread out for us. No running. No playground. One super awkward teeth-clanking kiss goodbye.
Playground hangouts ensued, where I told him the next person I officially dated would be the one I'd marry. I was ashamed of myself for having a child with someone I didn't want to spend my life with, and wanted any "dating" I did to really teach me about what I wanted and what I could give. My famous line to Eric was "I am going to go one 100 dates before I commit to someone" - I agreed to be his girlfriend two weeks later.
No one thought it would last. That there was no way a 23 year old Eric would be tied down to someone with a baby. That this was just another rebound for Lauren. Dates continued to be trips to the zoo (Eric's first birthday gift to my daughter), stroller walks, at-home dinners.
Then Lauren gets pregnant again. Even through two forms of protection, it happened. This turned a new, fun relationship into an "oh shit, do we really want a life together?" (I'm painting such a lovely picture of myself in this story, aren't I?) A few days after working up the courage to tell our parents, I started bleeding. The pregnancy was ectopic and I had to have emergency surgery to remove it. I'll never forget calling Eric into his Mom's back bathroom where I discovered the bleed; he went to sit in his Step-Dad's office, in the dark. When I went to check on him he had one thing to say: I want to marry you.
This was just four months into our relationship, but being forced to make the decision of whether we were together for a pregnancy or together for love made us realize the ladder. Eric went to my Dad's house to ask his permission and receive the ring my Grandmother had left me, and less than a year later we were Mr. and Mrs. Dorschied.
I have to admit, to everyone that told us we didn't know what we were getting into, that marriage is a life long commitment that can't be based simply on love, that it takes endless hard work - you were right. We had to learn through some hard years exactly what that effort meant, and we are so lucky we did.
Looking back on all of this is absolutely wild. Club Kid Eric, who I met at age 18 with a boyfriend, who I gave my number to on a whim, is now the father of both my beautiful daughters, and providing our dream life in North Carolina. We always say that if there was ever a meant-to-be, we are it. If we don't work out, it doesn't exist. If one of us didn't go out dancing that night, if I didn't give him my number, if I never reached out a year later, if he didn't go through those phone records...
12 years together today, and I wouldn't change one thing.
