North Carolina Bound

This decision to move has been absolute craziness.

Despite the fact that my husband has talked about moving to North Carolina since I met him, there were two big factors this year that solidified the decision for us; one was being on a beach in Florida during the winter, and thinking "hmmm...this not being cold thing is pretty nice". The other, was a co-worker of my husband who was about to enter retirement and found out he had cancer with a limited amount of time to live. These two different perspectives on both location and living life gave us the permission we needed to really look into this move for ourselves. And, as excited as we were to take this risk, it's been anything but easy.

No one wants to see their children, grandchildren, best friends, or massage therapist (wink) move away, so telling people our news hasn't quite been filled with hugs and congratulations, but more with tears, disappointment, worry, and lack of support. Understandably so, but not the best feeling nonetheless.

And of course we are scared ourselves! We are leaving everything and everyone we've ever known. It's an even bigger leap for my husband who has lived in this same area for 32 years, and has a state job with all the bells and whistles. But, at this point, it's scarier for us to not try. After all these years of talking and wondering and wishing, we have to make the jump and just see. Even if it means falling on our faces. Even if it doesn't turn out to be what we've imagined. We have so many questions that can only be answered by just going for it. There are no failures, just lessons learned. Because it could be everything we want it to be, and could be the perfect decision for our family - and there's only one way to find out.

Our incredible therapist has been instrumental in this big decision by showing us what a gift it is for our children. He explained how we tend to feel stuck where we are raised; our family is there, our friends our there, our familiar doctors, gyms, restaurants - you name it - it's all in one place. And the longer we stay, the harder it is to leave; family member's get sick, children become more attached, work ladders are climbed - the thought of leaving it all can seem impossible. And that's exactly why we are doing it. Our daughter's are young enough that they can make new friends and adapt, and yet old enough that they need babysitters less and less. Our parents are in good health and don't rely on our care. Our relationship with our friends has become so strong that we don't doubt they'll visit - and vice versa. We can't thank our therapist enough for shining light on these realities and supporting us throughout the process.

The strength in our little family of 4 has never been more visible, as we know we are all each other will have for those first several months of moving and adjusting. We communicate with the kiddos every step of the way, and have each others backs when support is limited. We talk endlessly about our fears, the potential struggles, the what-ifs, and together come up with a game plan for when those tough times hit. We talk with excitement about our new possibilities (the girls are particularly excited about learning to surf), and all we could make possible in our new southern life together. If it weren't for years of personal growth, a willingness to work hard, growing along the same path, and supporting each other along the way, this move wouldn't be possible. I am so proud of my husband for taking such a big risk to live out a lifetime dream, and the work he's put into himself as an individual, a husband and a father. I am so proud of my daughters for voicing their doubts and desires about the move, and for being our little buddies through it all. I'm excited for our 3 dogs to have the outdoor life they deserve, and for myself as a runner to have less mitten-wearing months on the pavement.

This move is terrifying, heart breaking, stressful, anxiety-ridden, and yet despite all of that, still something we want more than anything. Here's to risk taking, the strength of our family, and to figuring it all out as we go.